I recently stayed with Will and Angie for about a week and a half. I will cherish that time forever. Even amidst the sadness and uncertainty, there is hope and joy. Being away from them now, I realized something else – how much I dearly love reading updates to see what is happening, as I know so many of you are as well.
As was stated in the most recent blog, Will has been resting much. Upon exiting the hospital, a new team took charge to labor on Will’s behalf. A team of Angie, his friends, his family, Angie’s family, and of all of us who continue to hope and fight and pray for Will.
We continue to fight for and with Will but it is indeed a tricky balance between hope and healing and the reality of the situation at hand.
Some people have given up hope for Will’s life on earth, expecting the doctors’ timeline for his life to run its course. Others are assuming God must and will heal him. There is probably a balance in there somewhere and it’s hard to know. We don’t know the outcome but we want to do everything we know to do while continually relying and trusting in the Lord.
But even in moments of anguish, Will continues to do what he loves to do best – he’s bringing people together and he’s creating. Someone said it best in one of the blog comments recently, that we shouldn’t miss the miracle of all of us being brought together because of one man’s suffering. Will has always wanted to bring people together for good – and he is doing that now more than ever. Will has never cared what someone looks like, what someone believes in, or anything like that, he simply loves and cares for each person he meets along his journey. And he and Angie are oh so good at loving and caring for people on their journey. And secondly, to create, Will is still finding ways to create amidst his resting… When many of his friends were in town, what did he say? He said, “Let’s create and build something.” Someone echoed, “A tower!” With a smile on his face, Will responds, “We know how that worked out (Tower of Babel). We’ll do ours differently.”
Each moment with Will is cherished and his joy and sense of humor is as sharp as ever.
While sitting with a group of friends, he said, “I’m gonna have to take some medicine and its gonna have to go through my stomach, so deal with it.”
His friend Reva told him she was going to dip his hand in some cold water while he was asleep. He let her know it wouldn’t matter. “I’ll probably pee my pants anyways while I’m sleeping.”
Another time as he was joking about himself and he said, “I wasn’t going to tell anybody. It was a deathbed confession.” Blanks stares across the room. ….”I can make that joke, haha”
He might not be awake a lot. But Will is still here. And he’s doing what he loves. Creating and bringing people together even though he cannot see it.
I locked eyes with Will the other day and he hung his head softly and said, “It’s hard man.”………… “I hate this, ya know.” My sister Kelli said to Will, “We’re not giving up on you.” And he responded, “I don’t want to give up….. I just don’t know how (to keep fighting).”
Nobody knows what God has planned. Is Will like Job and will be restored 100 fold? Is he like Paul and must carry on with a thorn in his flesh? Or is he like a Stephen, a young godly man, taken too soon in the eyes of those close to him but in the perfect fulfillment of God’s plan for him on earth?
I want to be confused or get angry. I want to ask a thousand times “Why Will?” But at the same time, I see that “only Will.” Of those I know, only Will could suffer so patiently. Only Will could create and bring so many people together while resting. And as Angie mentioned one evening, as the months go by God’s ripple reaches out further and further. More people are being touched, inspired, and impacted by their story. A story in despair. But a story drenched with hope. And full of love. I want to wish it was
anyone but Will. I want to wish it were me. But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t suffer so graciously. But maybe one day, if I too have to, I will be able to because of the example he has been to me.
When asked recently, “(Will), what are you praying?” He responded by saying, “I’m just praying that God would continue to hold on to me.”
And God, we pray that as well. Might you hold on to Will as he rests. And may You continue to bring people together because of the life Will has lived and is living so well.
-John
GIVE MONEY
12 Comments
Matt Inman
April 10, 2013“the good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him.”
matthew 12:35
Judy
April 10, 2013Thank you for such a beautiful update John. Thank you for bringing us into the presence of the here and now with Will. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and fears and hopes and enlightenment. Heavenly Father today I pray boldly for Will. I pray that your will be done and that Will does not suffer. Heavenly Father I pray that Will knows 100%, with absolutely no doubt that you are right there with him. That you have such a special purpose for his life and that you will never leave him. I pray that Will is able to experience the peace that surpasses all understanding and that he knows he is safe in your arms. You would never harm Will dear Lord. You never promised us a life of ease. You promised us a life of hope and everlasting life should we chose to believe in you. Heavenly Father we believe in you with all of our might. Will has touched so many people through his illness and will continue to reach many more. Heavenly Father please lay your holy healing hands upon Will’s body and let him be at peace. Let his struggling end. While his body is healing let Will’s spirit soar and take away his earthly pain. Heavenly Father we ask that you make Will’s journey just a little bit easier, just for today, just for now, we ask that you give him reprieve and let him feel safe and at peace in your loving arms. Heavenly Father we thank you for all of the angels you have surrounding and loving Will. We thank you that you have put in place so much loving support for him. Heavenly Father I ask that for today you rock Will gently in your loving arms and let him snuggle like an infant and feel totally safe and loved. In Jesus name I pray. Amen. oxox
Kiki Alexander
April 9, 2013I am a family member of Harrison Cowan. I reside in Iowa and just want to send my thoughts and prayers at this time. Is there a way to publish this on my wall on fb to help, I would like to do so. I surround myself with good people and know of many donations that I can help to work toward any financial cost. Please contact me through e-mail or facebook me a post so I can help. Sending much love from the Cowan family. Love Kiki
Leah (Duke) Cook
April 9, 2013Will is an awesome person, and this story just keeps impacting others. I was one of the blessed at Union to get to spend some quality time with Will. He & his bandmates were fixtures at our apartment my senior year, and we got to hang with the guys a lot even before that. He is just an awesome person to know, and I’m so glad that so many people are seeing that through his story. Will, I continue to pray & hope for you and Angie. I know our God is a big God, and He can do whatever it is that He wants to do. You are such an honoring Christian to stand so strongly for Him not matter the circumstances. You’ve always been an inspiration through your music and your voice. You are truly a Christian inspiration as time goes on. You never know who you are touching out there. #stillpraying #goteamgray
Leah
Jennifer Nealey
April 9, 2013Thank you for sharing. What a testimony! We are praying that God will hold on to all of you!
Tom Willett
April 9, 2013Isn’t he lovely? Isn’t he wonderful? Isn’t he lovely? Life and love are the same.
Cindi Idle
April 9, 2013Thank you, John.
Beth
April 9, 2013Amen
Jenny S
April 9, 2013Just beautiful. I am so touched, moved, and inspired each time I read another update. I am praying for Will, Angie, and all of Team Gray. May God continue to hold you tightly Will and give you strength and peace as you walk this road. <3
Leslie
April 9, 2013Wonderfully said! I attended Union but you probably wouldn’t know me. I have found your blog/story through mutual friends. I don’t have words to say that could even begin to do anything, but I can tell you that I am praying. Praying for God to be glorified in this. Praying for healing, strength, comfort. Praying for a MIGHTY work!
After reading entry after entry about Will (and Angie and many others) and his GODLY attitude and focus through this all, this song comes to mind.
Your love has captured me
Your grace has set me free
Your life the air I breathe
Be glorified in me
You set my feet to dancing
You set my heart on fire
In the presence of a thousand kings
you are my one desire
I stand before you now
With trembling hands lifted high
Be glorified
God is at work in a mighty way through this story. I, myself, have been touched! I need for God to be GLORIFIED in me! Will you are a great example and I pray that others continue to see Him through you for a LONG time!
We are praying for you all!
Rachel Ballard
April 9, 2013What an awesome post.
God, in Jesus name, have continued mercy and grace on Will. I ask Father that you hide him in your pavilion and give him complete rest. You are the great Physician and you work all things for the good for those who love you. Lord, Will loves you – and I know Father that you love him more. Hold him. Hide him. Heal him. Guide him. Strengthen him. Give his wife the peace and grace to be exactly what you need her to be. In Jesus name, amen!!
I look forward to following this journey with you. Please know, you are touching others and showing Gods love in the process!! God Bless, Rachel
Matt Inman
April 9, 2013Well said.